Tracking Down Mackenzie

Yesterday was a long day. I set off at 7.30am and headed for Norwich Railway Station. It takes about an hour to walk from my house and I needed to get the 9am train to London. I went straight for the quiet carriage, which was almost empty, and passed the time by reading The God Delusion. Anyway, you don’t care about this. I have been keeping it pretty quiet on here but the plan was to try and meet Mackenzie Crook aka Gareth. I discovered that he’s in Jerusalem at the Apollo Theatre until mid-January so I decided such dire time constraints called for me to stoop lower than I have ever stooped before… I became an autograph hunter.

The Apollo Theatre

Now let me tell you, all the pre-conceptions about autograph hunters are true. I know what you’re thinking, how can I get on my pedestal when this entire blog is just a glorified autograph hunt? Well, there is one crucial difference between myself and a typical autograph hunter – I have a purpose. One lady actually had one of those little autograph books and this annoyed me. I have never seen anyone use one of those before in my life outside Disney World. What’s the point? What do you do with it? All that does is prove how boring you are that you voluntarily waste your life hanging around theatres so for five seconds you can be in the presence of a celebrity. Why do people care so much about saying they have met a famous person? You will never hear me say that on this blog. I am tracking people down because I respect them professionally, I love The Office, and it’s a genuine pleasure to meet the people who made it so brilliant. Another thing that got me was one bloke who tried making conversation with everyone. Why? We all know what the deal is, just let them get on with it and get inside. Do they think they will ever be mates with these people? I can’t stand autograph hunters.

After about 15 minutes or so, Mackenzie arrived and I kept to my word. I asked him politely to sign the DVDs which he did, and I managed to grab a cheeky picture just to prove I actually did get his signature. He seemed like a nice guy, but part of me is mortified that he just thought I was another crazy autograph hunter. I’m sorry I have to rant. Another thing that annoyed me – the others would crowd any actor who approached the theatre and get their autograph, but because I was only interested in Mackenzie I looked like the rude one. That’s the sort of crowd I’m dealing with, when you end up looking impolite for NOT stalking someone.

Me and Mackenzie

Anyway I was thrilled to get Mackenzie’s signature on the DVD, regardless of the method. But that’s not all. I had a pre-arranged meeting with another star of The Office later that day which I made my way to after a celebratory coffee and croissant from Starbucks.


Derek – Production Photo

So Ricky posted this on Twitter yesterday, but otherwise we are being kept pretty in the dark about the new show, by his standards anyway. All we do know is it’s a comedy-drama for Channel 4 about a middle-aged bloke in a home based on a character he created over a decade ago, and Karl Pilkington has a proper acting role in it. Thoughts? Maybe we should get a massive sweepstake on the go – how many complaints will Ofcom get?

Ricky Gervais in Derek


Tracking Down Emma: Part 1

In the build up to the Tracking Down Ricky Christmas Special which I am releasing via YouTube on Christmas Eve, here is the first of two parts about my day in Stratford-Upon-Avon tracking down Emma Manton for my first signature.

I left Norwich at around 8am and headed west with my Mum as we started our 300 mile detour on the way home for Christmas. It was pretty easy going and we arrived midday. The first thing we saw on entering the city centre was William SHakespeare’s birthplace.

Shakey Woz Ere

If you didn’t know this is where he’s from and every other building is named after him or something he made, but it’s a lovely city and reminded me of York. For those of you who don’t know me I lived in York for three years and being here made me miss it a great deal. There were so many odd little shops to explore tucked away down little alleys. We went to Starbucks.

After a little wander around town we came across a sign for the Royal Shakespeare Theatre where I was due to meet Emma Manton and went asking for her at the information desk. I told them who I was meeting but I sounds like a bit of a wierdo. Nonetheless they pointed me in the direction of the stage door and left my details with the receptionist for Emma to give me a call back. I had no idea if today would bring a result as the last few emails I sent were unanswered, which meant either everything was fine or I was about to walk straight into a restraining order and the end of Tracking Down Ricky.

As we waited for an answer we had a stroll around the little park and waterfront area where the theatre was situated. It was lovely, except for the pigeons who I think were trying to intimidate me. Little dollops of poo were falling all around me as I took this picture of the river. It’s now 2pm and we decide to head back the way we came and explore a few little shops like HMV with our fingers firmly crossed…

A River